Funeral director do this, but why? (Part I)
A pleasant day to you, without much further ado, allow me to kick off this journey of discovery and “ahaaaa” moments about certain customs, traditions and things we do and why. Names are left out and locations have been changed to protect the identity of my “teacher” as views on such matters differ greatly and there really isn’t a definitive rule book on this.
To set the scene, I’m in Penang. After half a morning of touristy activities and Chendol, I came upon an old traditional paper effigies and offerings shop. Curiosity got the better of me and I decided to see if the really old man on the rocking chair inside would entertain some of my questions. Apparently, this shop has been passed down through generations and still very much relevant.
As I approached a worker bending rattan sticks to form the foundation of a massive 12 footer paper house, the old man nodded to a little child playing inside and told the kid to come get me. My worry was “oh oh”, as “tourist get out” vibes hit my senses. Surprisingly, the kid said “ah gong want to see you clearly”. I proceeded to walk over and respectfully greeted the old man. He beckoned me to have a sit and began to light up his pipe. As the fragrance of rolled tobacco filled the shop house, my first thought is, “smoking in a paper making shop didn’t sound quite safe”. Before I could open my face hole to say something, he chuckled and says he knows why I am there and what did I want to know. And so, thus began a 3 day Q & A on all the things funeral related.
Question: Why do we put the lantern & white strip of cloth at car park or street entrances?
Answer: After taking a drag of his pipe, he started rocking slowly in his chair. He then explained that before electricity was piped into the kampongs and older streets, kerosene lamps were the only source of lighting. So that solves the lighting part, but what about the white strip of cloth? Well, with so many kerosene lamps lighting up alleyways and kampong pathways, the white strip demarcates to family members, friends and well wishers, that the funeral is held there. That explains it pretty well, except for why we still do it today. He continued rocking and with half closed eyes, he simply said, that’s what tradition means. Things that came about for a real reason but continuity makes it tradition. I also agree this is still relevant in Singapore, even though streets and block numbers are brightly lit. For those “directionally challenged” drivers and well wishers, the lantern can be very useful.
Question: Why after 5 PM, undertakers aren’t allowed to setup funeral wakes?
Answer: The old man stooped rocking and still with half closed eyes, shook his head and muttered “so hai” (Cantonese phrase for idiot) under his breath. The worker snapped a rattan stick and sniggered. Feeling embarrassed by my “so hai-ness”, I maintained composure and asked if i could light my cigarette. He pushed over an ashtray and nodded gently. The old man then explained. The actual theory is after sundown, we do not setup funerals, not 5 PM. Reason being, it’s really hard to carry out such work while holding on to kerosene lamps. So in modern day brightly lit surroundings, it is not a problem to do work after sundown. Tradition aside, it is a way for modern undertakers to charge extra for work after 5 PM. Hence the continuation of this “rule” persists.
Question: Why do we put sandalwood powder & sandalwood chips into the casket?
Answer: The old man, taps out the spent tobacco into the ashtray and passes it to the little kid, who then proceeds to clean it out. He explains, back then, there was no embalming. So to mask smells, pungent incense products were placed inside. And when the day of electricity became available together with the invention of fridges, ice was used to maintain a body for the duration of the wake. In some places even till today, ice is still used as a measure of prolonging the state of one’s body.
Question: Why do we put cotton wool, the lotus blanket below and above the deceased?
Answer: The old man shifts his position in his rocking chair. He rocks once and beckons the kid for a fresh supply of tobacco and his pipe. His pause got me thinking and I did not want to be “so hai-ed” again. My face lit up and I quickly answered my own question. From my many years of experience in transferring the dearly departed, I know that our muscles relax and our “internal stuff” gets purged from our orifices. The cotton wool is to absorb liquids and the various blankets to cover the visibility of solids.
Question: Why when closing the casket, everyone has to either turn around or face the floor?
Answer: The worker came over and whispered something to the old man. The old man nodded and the worker carried a pair of paper “maids” (金童玉女) out to his pickup truck and proceeded on a delivery I suppose. Well, he said, this question has quite a few answers. Starting with people whose Chinese animal sign offend or clashes with God of Tai Sui (犯太岁 和 破太岁) that year.
The official version is that people who offend or clash with Tai Sui a particular year cannot attend funerals or matters of “Yin” nature. But to follow that will mean quite a fair bit of loved ones, friends and family cannot pay their last respects. In order to counter this, during certain processes, those who have animal signs clashing or offending, are told to turn away or look down. It has evolved into telling everyone to do so, simply because it is easier than going round asking each and everyone what their animal sign is and to remember what sign clashes what year.
The unofficial version is that back in those days, undertaker coolies were very poor. These jobs were also undertaken by people of a certain caste. The closing of the casket is the time when the coolies can take certain things, out of pure necessity. Things like shoes, belts, clothing or even valuables. We may think, in our modern day context, that it’s unethical and disrespectful. However, bear in mind how poor most generally were back then and salaries were like 10 cents a day and a bowl of noodles perhaps 5 cents, already half of a day’s earnings. Most coolies may not even get salaries. They get a place to sleep and food, in the shop house and in return for taking stuff from the dearly departed, they give offerings and keep their graves clean.
Why do we need to turn away when undertakers transfer our loved one from the stretcher into the casket?
Answer: The old man chuckled and replied. Back then, bullock carts were used. Stretchers were not commonplace. During the process of transferring the deceased from the cart to the casket, it is a rather clumsy and un-glamorous process. And with bodily fluids and waste leaking out, it’s best that all who is present do not witness this. Even in today’s context, it can be ungainly especially if the dearly departed is heavyset.
The old man yawned and started rocking. I sensed it was time for his afternoon nap. I thanked him for an enlightening session and bade him farewell for that day. He smiled and reached for his pipe, and told me to come by the next day if I thought of more questions. The kid who had been sitting and listening intently jumped up and gleefully held my hand to walk me out. He said “goodbye uncle”, and scampered back in to probably ask the old man why this Non-Chinese looking uncle speaks fluent Hokkien and Cantonese.